Faith

Pure Delight

23 April 2015 0

imageI was reminded on Sunday, a few days after bringing home our son, of God’s faithfulness. In 2 short years, I went from being blind and ignorant, to a little less blind and ignorant.

“Delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart”. Psalm 37:4

In the turmoil I faced not being able to have children, God spoke to me and gave me this verse. I convinced myself for so long that God didn’t want me to have children – I should be happy without it, but it was still killing me.

In the midst of my despair, He reached out and spoke to me, and through some divine intervention, I finally understood it.

Delight in the Lord.

My whole heart attitude changed, and I began to truly delight in our Saviour. For so long I thought I wasn’t worthy, and that this was a punishment. I misunderstood it completely. You’d think growing up in the church, I would’ve known better, but it’s a different scenario when you’re the one actually drowning.

We are worthy. No matter what we’ve done, no matter how many times we’ve screwed up or even been angry at God, he still loves us. When I finally got it, I was able to take true delight in Him and then, in His perfect timing, life began falling into place.

“There is nothing we can do to make God love us more and there is nothing we can do to make God love us less.”
– Philip Yancey

We decided on adoption, and met our daughter a few days later. She came home with us 2 weeks after that. I struggled with parenthood and the loss of having my ‘own’ child, but still I steadily looked for God, in wonder and in anger. He still heard me and He still answered my prayers, and saved me from myself.

Two years later, God gave me the verse again, 3 days after bringing our son home.

“Delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart”. Psalm 37:4

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