5 years ago today, Bryan and I said our "I do's" surrounded by many loving friends and family, at our church in Lonehill. It was short and sweet, and I was the happiest I had ever been.
Our wedding was quite unique, in many ways. Compared to most modern weddings, it was very low-key, mainly due to the fact that we had no budget for it (and neither did our parents). This didn't stop us from getting married though. We also had a morning wedding, with no formal reception or meal or anything fancy. And it was perfect.
But I didn't always feel this way - at my actual wedding as I mentioned, I was so happy - I mean, I was getting married to the man of my dreams, united not only in marriage, but before God with all our friends and family. But a year later, after going to the 6th lavish wedding with a 5-course meal, I felt like I didn't get the wedding, proposal or engagement I deserved and I cannot tell you why I battled with this (maybe it was my hormonal problems, or my former naive and shallow self, or just feeling like if everyone else gets it, I should have it too) but I just did and I felt so hard-done by.
Then I grew up a little, and our marriage started to grow, and I loved Bryan more and more every day, until I realised how amazing that day was, as is. It was just the START of something wonderful. Looking back 5 years ago to that single day, I can't believe I felt so 'entitled'. I truly had the best wedding I could've imagined.
So I couldn't afford to buy a wedding dress, but I got to use one of my best friends' dress! What an honour. And we didn't get a fancy reception, but people brought and contributed and we all shared a light meal on a beautiful Saturday morning. My guest list wasn't limited, and our church and now family was the wonderful place we said our "I do's" with praise and worship to the wonderful God who brought us together and has brought us so far.
What I had to learn about marriage is its not about the wedding - the wedding is amazing but it doesn't define your love or your marriage... It is just the beginning of that journey. And I learnt that about raising children as well - oh how I longed to be pregnant and raise a new born, but God needed to show me, in His all-knowing way, that there is so much more to these ideals, and I am a better person, wife and mom because of it.
Thank you Jesus!